What Truth’s Beneath

Most people believe because I am a professional speaker, I am an extrovert.

Most people believe because I am successful in sales, I am an extrovert.

Most people believe because I like to host parties, I am an extrovert.

Most people are wrong…including my family!

One of the perks of working for myself is allowing time for self-discovery and learning on a daily basis. I am consistently trying to understand what makes me happy, sad, anxious, excited, motivated, inspired, depressed and fulfilled (the list is endless).

I have learned, as I’ve aged (eek!), the more I understand about myself, the more I am able to position my relationships with others to succeed.

Recently I learned I am an introvert. Crazy. Until it wasn’t crazy at all; it was actually straightjacket spot on.

Once I learned this about myself, (where have I been all these years?), I decided to poll my family, friends, and fans. I asked the question, ‘Would you classify me as an Extrovert or Introvert?’ on my Facebook Page. The results were 56% extrovert, 13% introvert, and 31% somewhere in the middle. Lucky 13! 13% got it right. I can’t blame the others, including my own father, because for so many years I had it wrong too.

On the surface I may exhibit traits associated with being an extrovert, however, what truth lies beneath, is a complete introvert. Knowing this truth is power.

Why you need to know the underlying truth about yourself:

1. Happiness. Someone in my private Facebook group posed the question:

“How does one know if they’re happy? What are those metrics?”

Great question. My answer:

“I measure my happiness by the mood in which I wake up, go to bed, my thoughts and the words I choose to use throughout the day. I find when I am full of joy, I find the positive in everything and limit my negative thoughts/words.”

Which is definitely an answer to the latter question. However, the first part, knowing if one is happy begins with knowing yourself, really knowing yourself. Digging deep within your soul/spirit/being/consciousness, whatever you prefer to call it, and knowing who you are, what makes you tick, where your passion lies, things/actions/people that destroy the core of what you stand for. Being introspective, which has nothing to do with being an introvert, is a skill-set each person needs. As you age and mature, I believe some of this comes with it. You begin to care less about what others are thinking or doing and you seek more to fulfill yourself. It’s not something completely understood only with age or maturity, it takes you asking yourself tough questions, spending time alone, and reflecting on your past identifying what you want for your future. You spend so much time getting to know other people…how much time are you spending getting to know yourself? Once I learned I was a true introvert, I also learned my precious “me time” is a much needed element of my happiness. Want to get to know yourself better? Spend some time scrolling through your own social media and take notice of the reoccurring themes. They will give you great insights into what you find important, what you focus on, and how you want others to perceive you. Get ready to have your mind blown!

2. Position. When you know who you are, your motivation style, how you communicate and prefer to be communicated with, all of your wants, needs, dreams and desires, you are able to better position yourself for success. Freaking Brilliant! People, perhaps even you, waste their precious lifetime working to make others happy. Don’t get me wrong, I love making other people happy, but only if their happiness is a result of me being authentic to my purpose, my own happiness and myself. Understand yourself and you’ll begin to make decisions accordingly. Those decisions will position you to be in perfect alignment. That kind of perfect alignment you can’t pay your chiropractor for, you can only find it within yourself and take the appropriate actions to live it each day…oh what sweet success! One part of my perfect alignment with being an introvert is positioning myself correctly in my relationships. I don’t do well being in large groups and surface level talk, so I surround myself with friends who enjoy one-on-one time with me. I’m also aware that life is about compromise so I don’t say no to opportunities to be in large group settings, I do however understand myself well enough to know it’s going to drain my spirit and I’ll need some time post-event to recharge…alone!

Ultimately, when you know yourself, truly know YOU, all the way down to the core of the layered onion (I hate onions BTW but it’s a necessary analogy here), you will operate in fulfillment. Isn’t that a goal in life, to live each day feeling fulfilled? Your definition of fulfillment will be different than mine and that, my friends, is what can make this world a wondrous place. Imagine, seven billion unique individuals, spending their time in this life, matching their inner being with their outward actions, walking in complete joy and fulfillment. Imagine. I wonder if you can. You may say I’m a dreamer and it’s true. I hope someday you’ll join my dreamer ways and live aligned with the best one, your beautiful self.

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